Question: I am seeking a solution to my problem. I am twenty-four years old. A young man proposed to me. He has finished college. He is from a religious family. After my father agreed to him, he asked me to come to see him. I saw him and was pleased with him and he was pleased with me. [We saw each other] because our pure religion has stated that I should see him and he should see me. However, when my mother came to realize that he was from a religious family, she became harsh against him and my father. She swore that such a marriage would never take place in anyway. My father desperately tried to persuade her, but to no avail. Do I have the right to seek the Law to intervene in this matter?

Response: If the matter is as you have mentioned in your question, then your mother has no right to make any objection. Indeed, such a stance is forbidden. You are not obliged to obey your mother in matter. This is because the Prophet (peace be upon him) said,

"Obedience is in what is good and right."¹

Rejecting a suitable proposal is not from what is good and right. In fact, it has been narrated that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said,

"If one whose religion and character pleases you proposes to you, you should marry him. If you do not do so, there will be tribulations in the land and great evil."²

If you have need to take your matter to a court of law, you would not be wrong in doing so.

Shaikh ibn Baz

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Footnote

1. Recorded by al-Bukhari and Muslim.-JZ

2. Recorded by al-Tirmidhi and ibn Majah, with the last word being 'areedh instead of kabeer, as written in this text. (The two words are very close in meaning.) Shaikh ibn Baz presents the hadith in his answer in a form that implies that he does not consider the hadith authentic. However, in an answer to another question, he stated that it was recorded by al-Tirmidhi with a hasan chain. Similarly, al-Albani has concluded that it is hasan. Al-Albani, Sahih al-Jami, vol. 1, p. 112.--JZ

Islamic Fatawa Regarding Women - Darussalam Pg.169-170